Calgon take me away...nope, not gonna cut it. I need a plane.

Busy busy...that's what the Guyanese say when a toddler is running around and getting into everything.

"He's so busy."

I like it. It's quite accurate. Aidan is busy learning and making new associations on a daily basis. I'll get to that in another post...right now I need to be negative.

I've been busy too...amazing given that there is NOTHING to do here. I realize that I haven't posted since election night. What has happened to the time?

So I have a lot to say...and I must warn you, this is a busy post. I'm going to skip around all sorts of issues...and I just don't care, because it's My Blog. My Rant.

First off, I'm jealous of my husband. Right after the election, Richard left town for a week as the local coordinator for a US Navy medical mission in the town of Santa Rosa. Here's a link to a story. You can see his backside in the second photo (the guy with the yellow shirt and hat): 

http://www.stabroeknews.com/news/north-west-residents-grateful-for-us-medical/

Great opportunity for him to do something different and to get out of Georgetown. The guesthouse he stayed in was a bit dismal, but he was doing something to help others and he got out of Georgetown!!

I need that opportunity! Some expats told us when we first arrived that you need to leave Georgetown every 3 months to feel sane. I said, "no way"....I mean, we were in the Peace Corps, what can be so bad?

Well, my limit isn't 3 months: it's 5 months. There is just nothing to do here so you feel trapped. And when I say nothing to do, I mean you don't even really have a place to wander and window shop, no restaurants to really look forward to, and hardly anywhere to take Aidan to play beyond the national park and botanical gardens. I'm scared to go to the zoo because of conditions I've heard about. 

It's a feeling of being trapped, in a hot cage where the weather doesn't change. You can't just jump in your car and go somewhere. First off, the driving is scary, and second, the roads are piss-poor the farther you get from Georgetown and most places you might want to go you actually have to go by speedboat. You can't get to places over bridges by car very easily, and the potholes on those little roads will kill our Rav4. So you have to plan and you need money.

So you're trapped.....to make do in your house with what you have...and ants start taking over the kitchen, and your AC stops working, and your only escape, the internet, doesn't want to cooperate either, and then you just want to take a pleasant stroll without the worry of mosquitoes carrying Dengue fever biting your little one.

I'm sure my last supervisor is laughing right now if he's reading this. When I told him we were going to Guyana, he looked at me with wide, cynical eyes, "what is it with you Peace people wanting to go to third world countries!?!"

I really don't mean to be negative. I mean, I like to think that I'm open-minded about these things. It's an adventure. Each culture has a uniqueness that can become endearing. My time in Bulgaria taught me that you can't really understand your own culture until you live in another...and there's plenty to not like about the US (although the election of Obama has me feeling pretty proud about my country lately - but again, that's another post).

In the past couple of weeks I've found myself feeling more nostalgia for Bulgaria. Through all the corruption and lack of customer service, they still have some pride and culture. Bulgaria can go somewhere. 

But I don't want to compare my experience here to Bulgaria, because the experience is VERY different (just to lay out the most obvious...I was single and a volunteer in Bulgaria, now I'm married to a diplomat, given he is my Peace Corps sweetheart, with a 17-month old boy and no job of my own).

Culture here is a mish-mash that I was looking forward to exploring. It's interesting on the one-hand, because there are so many different religions (which you would think would make people more tolerant) with the interesting mesh of indian curry and chinese fried-rice that permeates the "caribbean" food culture. But they haven't really latched on to what they view as important and valued about their culture that they want to preserve. Everyone wants to immigrate and buy American products. They don't think about what they should produce here to keep this country going. Now I don't want to generalize, because some entrepreneurs are doing some great things (aquaculture, for example), but overall I find myself feeling very sad about this country. The poverty and lack of desire to make it better. Instead, here's the attitude: let's leave. 

Paul Collier put is succinctly in his book "The Bottom Billion" when discussing Cuba: 

To my mind, development is about giving hope to ordinary people that their children will live in a society that has caught up with the rest of the world. Take that hope away and the smart people will use their energies not to develop their society but to escape from it.

I haven't found one thing that I will treasure and it makes me sad.....neither a treasure that I've learned, an insight I've gained by being here, nor a material treasure...the unique ethno-plunder that you bring back from the places that you have lived and travelled.

And no matter how hard I try, I can not, CAN NOT get over the driving. Here is an example that seems to happen to me on a daily basis:

First, remember that we drive on the left-hand side of the road with the steering wheel on the right.

Second, most roads are quite narrow with no sidewalks to speak of.

I'm waiting at the stop light behind 4 or so cars to turn right (this would be your normal left-hand turn in the States).

Imagine seeing the number count down on the crosswalk before it gets to zero and your light turns green.

10, 9, 8..horns start beeping...7, 6, 5...more horns...the light is still red people!!....4, 3, 2...out of my rear view mirror I see a car coming in the right-hand lane beside me, on a two lane road, in the opposite direction of traffic, at top speed to go around all the cars in the left-lane, who have just started moving to go when the red light is still 2 seconds from turning green...this car speeds around all cars to go straight through the light. 

Think of this: if I didn't look in my rear-view mirror EVERY SINGLE TIME, I am bound to make that right turn and hit this car, which is going around my right and not turning right, but going straight through the intersection.

Can you imagine????

I mean, it' one thing to pass someone when everyone is just going straight. But passing cars who are planning to turn in your direction in the middle of an intersection??!?!?

wtf!?!

And that happens to me almost on a daily basis.

I guess everyone here has somewhere to be in a real hurry, I just can't seem to figure out where that would be.

I counted yesterday, and my heart stopped 5 times on the 10-minute ride home from a friend's. I think I'll have a heart-attack if I don't get into an accident before leaving Guyana.

I long for the days of sane driving, where people generally observe traffic laws. I really don't think I'll need to call people jerks in the States for driving too close, etc. It just doesn't in any way compare.

So, do I need to get out of town?  YES!!  Maybe if I had a chance to experience the interior and rainforest, I would see the beauty of Guyana..the beauty of it's people and nature. I hope. But from where I'm standing right now, I find little hope.

We're going away for four days for Christmas to Rockview Lodge in the savannah. It looks nice yes? Will my hope for Guyana be restored? Tourism, birding, craft?

Okay, you got me. What I'm really looking forward to is our trip home in late Feb. Cold weather, skiing, good food, orderly driving, friends and family...what more can you ask for?

Can anyone tell me whatever happened to Calgon anyway? Did the likes of the Body Shop take over? I can't even think about taking a hot bath..it's too damn hot! The first time I've had a jacuzzi bathtub and I don't even want to use it!!

When there's nothing to do and your feeling quite blue, call for Duck Ellington, he always comes through.

Sorry, jazz from a duck won't cut it either. Only a plane will suffice. Please.

p.s. to my husband. Don't say again "that's the differential" or I'll give you a differential parting gift on your ass as I jump on the first plane out of here. You see, the differential is the amount that he is paid above his salary for living in a place such as this. You wouldn't have a high differential if you lived in say, Ireland. Bulgaria would be a modest differential. Here, it's high. The differential is calculated based on a number of factors, not the least of which is the ease with which you can ESCAPE! Maybe I'll be a consultant with the following Lesson Plan: 

How to not spend entire differential on escape trips every 5 months so that you don't go completely insane.

a special p.s. to the 'rents...don't worry, we're fine...I just needed to vent.